I am like the sea

I had a dream about Beth last night. She bought me one of those frames you put photos in and her boyfriend was in the front yard of the beach house next to mine. I was picking clothes up in my front yard, which was untidy.
Later, I decoded the dream. The gift of the picture frame with holes for photos was Beth giving me the memories of our time together. I'm free to hang them on the wall but she doesn't want to dwell on them. Her boyfriend was late forties, about five seven with black hair and a white shirt. This symbolized him being maturer and a clean slate. Maybe a better person. His lower height symbolized his not being ideal superficially (she is five nine and doesn't want someone shorter) but her being willing to make a concession. The rubbish in my yard symbolized not having sorted my life out and/or having baggage or issues. The juxtaposition of the beach houses simply shows the juxtaposition of the relationships in linear time.
I sent the dream and interpretation to Beth on WhatsApp. She said that he probably was more mature in some ways (mortgage, full time job, car, joint custody of kids) but she took issue with him not being superficially ideal. Okay, so he's ideal. I don't know, the dream was entirely based on my own suppositions, as I didn't even know his name before today.
At this point if you are curious about anything it may be to know why Beth and I parted ways. It was a strange relationship. We went out for almost exactly three months and from day one to the last day it went very well. We saw each other twice a week but were in touch all the time. She'd come round mine, I'd go round her, she'd come round mine. We'd snuggle up in bed and watch old VHS movies, we had tons of sex, we made plans for the future. See, I've always been into the paranormal and though Beth has no interest in that side of things she's always had that gift since a small child. I saw it in action. Even on the day Beth ended it we had been exchanging messages happily, as we normally did. But something I said had been bugging her and suddenly she couldn't suppress its significance.
When we first got together I warned Beth that I was planning to go to uni at some point and she said she was fine with that, she'd take each day as it came. Shortly after I decided to postpone uni for a year but this still gave me the conundrum of what to do a year down the line. Two months in I warned her that I still had to make that decision. She said she was fine with that but it turns out she wasn't fine with it. When we broke up she said I had given her a way out and she was taking it. She didn't want to be a 'stop gap' and a 'warm body'. She also said she loved me and I didn't love her and she had to pull out to protect her feelings before she got in deeper.
Well she had me tied to the wall, she was right. Though I was trying to protect her feelings I didn't think fully about how my warning might play out. The fact was, I had decided to go to a local university but Beth didn't know that. She said I should have told her, maybe she should have told me what she was thinking. As it was, I was dumped on the phone and the job was finished on Facebook. To this day I've never seen Beth again. I never got the chance to hug her one last time and she never saw the tears that were running down my face when she ended things.
Of course, we're not at that age where relationships can just tick along nicely without going anywhere. (Not that I ever had one of those). She is 42, I am 40. She has two young twins and, a twelve year old and two that are more or less out the nest. She don't be having time to mess with guys like me.
But then, who does? See, I am 40 and I don't have much going for me on paper. I'm on working tax credits, which is a fancy way of saying I do some work but get less money than someone on income support. At the moment I spend three pounds a day on food, am overweight and look worse than I ever have. I am too arty and articulate and weird for the average working class woman who I would otherwise have a cat in hell's chance with on OKCupid or Plenty of Fish yet too poor to attract other arty and articulate girls who don't consider themselves as materialistic. And so in my two and a half years of online dating since I returned from China I only managed two dates and one of those was converted into a three month probation period, which I failed.
Of course, there's no way I could have held onto Beth. She would have found me out sooner or later. I don't think she really loved me. She got over the break up in about two days flat whereas I am like the sea. Slow to warm and slow to cool.