Cereal killer

Beth said I needed to find my everything which seems like a pretty cruel thing to say to someone with my options. I've just expanded my online presence by joining Plenty of Fish and had a rough time ever since. It doesn't take long to discover that whatever it is a guy needs to attract women I haven't got it. Of course, that's not really true-surely?- but somehow I am in some very strange category that most women label as 'no thanks' though it's really called 'rare man with extraordinary gifts.' I wish I was joking but I'm not. Out of around ten carefully selected women I've messaged I got one message back, which was to put my photos and profile down. She liked my story, though. Here's my message to her:

'Good luck finding someone well travelled in Margate. That's all I wanted to say but a longer message is required so...um.. Once upon a time there was a cornflake called Gerald. One morning he woke up to find some of his friends had been eaten. It kind of put things in perspective. The moral of the story is there's always a cornflake worse off than you.'